Tis Better to Have Loved and Lost
by Animetor777
Summary: Hook washes onto the shore of a desert, injured and with amnesia. He gradually remembers who he was and his dark and painful past and he meets the one person who might be able to heal him. Hook-centric. UPDATED CH 14 UP!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Peter Pan and since I made the mistake of not doing this last time, this is a carry over disclaimer for this entire story because I don't want to have to keep typing it.**

_A/N Okay sorry, the research for this story took longer than I thought it would. Hook ends up in a nomadic desert tribe and since I know nothing about nomadic desert tribes this took a fair amount of research to get started formulating my own people for the purpose of this story. They are mainly based off of the Tuareg and Bedouin peoples of the Sahara desert but I also used some Gobi desert and Zimbabwe tribes for inspiration. But without further ado, on to the story. The timeline for this story is directly after The Flight of Moira Pan for those of you who've read it but it should also function as a stand alone story. If you have not read my first story then what you need to know is this, Hook has been set adrift in the ocean in a rowboat with only one oar and Peter is grown up and has a daughter named Moira who has saved Neverland and is happily living there._

Waves crashed against the soft white sand that appeared to glow in the moonlight. A plank bobbed in the water being steadily drawn to shore. It washed against the sand and a man rolled off of it. Most of his clothes were torn and his soaking, dark curls were plastered to his face that was drawn and as pale as death itself. He lay still and silent before coughing up water and breathing. His eyes snapped open and the forget-me-not blue orbs scanned the beach. He looked around once before falling into oblivion once again.

* * *

The next time he awoke he was staring at a dirt ceiling. He attempted to sit up only to fall back down in anguish. He felt as though he was being torn in half and looked down to see his midriff seemingly held together by thin, off white bandages. He started to pull at them, trying to see what was underneath.

"Touch it and I swear to you I'll make the healing worse than the injuries."

He gave a start and immediately regretted it. He tried looking up again, this time slowly, and found himself face to face with a short, stocky young woman. Half of her face was covered in a bright indigo veil and he couldn't tell what color her hair was, but her seemingly pupiless eyes were glaring at him daring him to disobey.

"I did **not** spend all of this time healing just to have you ruining it all by exposing your wounds to infections. Did you know I used up almost all of my creosote trying to keep you alive? No, I suppose not, you've been either unconscious or delirious since we found you. But I'm starting to ramble now, what's your name?"

"James Hook, Captain…I think." He answered uncertainly.

"Well Captain James Hook, how did you end up here? Did your, what did they call it, crew, mutiny?" she briskly set to work cleansing his wounds. She removed the bandages carefully to reveal a large discolored gash along his ribs. She dabbed at it carefully with a soaked cloth. Hook gritted his teeth against the pain of the liquid soaking into the gash "What is that?!" he asked, a wounded animal licking its wounds.

"Boiled Creosote. It will clean your cut and if it stings that means it's working. But I'm the one asking questions here, now what happened to you?"

Hook's bright blue eyes clouded over, "I-I'm not sure." He furrowed his brow trying desperately to remember something, anything! _My name is James Hook, I am a sea captain. Yes but who am I and where did I come from? _She could see that he was confused and hurt and had no idea what had happened to him.

"Well," she began gently, "Your physical wounds will take awhile to heal, maybe by the time they do your mental hurts will have as well." Having finished her job she turned to leave when Hook called out,

"Wait, who are **you**? Why did you take me in?"

"My name is Fatima. I am the healer of the Northern tribe of the Kahdoak people. And we took you in because unlike you pale pigs we have hearts that are not blackened by cruelty." She finished in a huff adding in her thoughts _well, at least we used to. _And then she exited the small room leaving Hook to the mercy of sweetly intoxicating sleep.

* * *

When he next regained consciousness he seemed to be in less pain and the fog had cleared from inside of his head. He successfully sat up and, encouraged by this victory, took his stomach's advice and went to look for food. Each step felt like it was tearing him apart, like fire had replaced the blood in his veins. He made it five steps before collapsing, crippled to the floor. He lay there, eyes closed tightly against the pain, holding on to reality with everything he could to keep himself from crying out in pain.

Fatima found him there an hour later. His eyes dull and lifeless, utterly exhausted by the struggle.

"What are you doing out of bed?!" Fatima asked furious at him, but even more so at her self for leaving him unsupervised. _Stupid! I should have known he'd do something like this. Men always push themselves too hard too fast. They __**never**__ give themselves time to heal and just end up hurting themselves more. Idiots. If they spent just one more day healing and not go straight into battle training when their released they might not have to be back in the infirmary again for another week just two days later. But no __**that**__ wouldn't be manly._ "I'm going to go get help, I can't lift you by myself, but first you have to promise me that you'll never do something that foolhardy again. Promise?" she looked him anger in her eyes but also, was that worry?

"I promise." Hook rasped struggling just to get the words out.

"Good I'll be right back, don't you dare move." Fatima rushed out to find someone strong to help her. She may have had lots of strength but she wasn't about to try and lift a full grown man who was deathly ill back into bed. _Now with a little bit of luck I'll find someone quickly and he won't have an infection on top of everything else when I get back._ "Someone help! Captain Hook tried to walk and fell. We need to get him back into bed, he's very ill." A portly, battle scarred man walked up to her.

"And why should we help him? We've kept him alive for three weeks wasting our supplies and time on him. We decided we'd only keep him until he got better, he's awake now, he should leave." He glared at Fatima his eyes narrowing to pitiless shards of flint.

"And where do you propose we send him Zaifel? To the desert?" she asked with a contemptuous tone entering her voice, "He'd be dead by nightfall even if he were healthy. And speaking of which I believe **I** will be the judge of when he's well, not you." She sent a poisonous glare toward him and searched the crowd that had gathered to watch the argument for someone who might help her. A slim young man stepped forward, what skin that was not covered by his head scarf and robes was paler than most and his eyes had a curious greenish tinge to them. He walked toward the healer saying,

"I will help you Fatima, we should be kinder to strangers. What happened to our open and hospitable people?" he glared pointedly at Zaifel, his eyes carrying a quiet steady fire that seemed to burn within.

"Thank you Nom." Fatima replied curtly accepting his offer of help. They walked away together a dignified silence surrounding them.

"Well of course **he'd** help the foreigner, they're practically brothers." Zaifel shouted after them hoping to get a rise out of Nom.

"Don't respond." Fatima whispered soothingly to him, "He's not worth it." Nom nodded and they finished the gauntlet of stares to the infirmary. When they reached it Hook looked up at them, his blue eyes pained and pleading. Fatima felt her heart clench to see him, or any human in such pain. Together she and Nom carefully lifted him back onto the carefully woven mesquite mattress. Hook settled gratefully into the cushioning and knew no more.

_A/N It's been awhile hasn't it. Well I finally got around to starting this story and I apologize for it's delay. I believe the reason and everything else is explained in the note above so all that's left for me to say is read, review and (hopefully) enjoy. I'd love any feedback you'd have for me. Even criticism as long as you include a suggestion on how I might make it better._

_Animetor777_

_P.S I apologize for the OOCness of Hook, it's part of the plot, he has amnesia and can't remember who he is and therefore does not act like himself._


	2. Chapter 2

_Idiot! Who wakes up after being passed out for three weeks and decides it's a good idea to go for a walk?! _Fatima paced the room in a huff occasionally glaring over at the strangely pale man on her bed, the gentle rise and fall of his chest reassuring her that despite the earlier fiasco he was still with her. With each pass she let out a small breath that she hadn't realized she was holding. She shook her head, trying to rid herself of these protective urges. _You shouldn't be helping him. Remember what his people did to you, they cannot be forgiven._ Satisfied that her protective shield was up she went to leave but stopped in her tracks when she heard a tortured moan coming from the bed. She pivoted on her feet to see his piercing blue eyes looking at her with fear. He spoke in a voice rough with sleep and self hatred.

"I know who I am."

* * *

"Took you long enough." Fatima spoke with only a shadow of her usual snarkiness and bravado in her tone. _I really don't have time to analyze that right now and really it wasn't that important at this moment. All I can see is their faces. The tortured expressions they wore when he,…no, I laughed cruelly at their suffering.__** I**__ had caused their terror. It was __**my**__ fault that they were so far gone that they weren't even begging for mercy any longer. The children I tore from the arms of their screaming parents. The ones that I had forced into relative slavery and had terrorized. _ I remembered what it felt like to run my hook through someone's gut and I felt the bile rise up my throat. I looked at it but now instead of seeing a useful and elegant appendage I now saw a disgusting and gruesome murder weapon. I wanted to be rid of it. I wanted to rear it from my arm and feel the pain. I wanted to suffer as I had made them. I didn't deserve to be in such comfortable surroundings, I didn't even deserve to live. I should have been left for dead weeks ago at least then I couldn't bring more agony into this world.

"Were you planning on sharing this revelation or do I need to learn how to read minds?" a biting voice cut through my thoughts. _I should answer_. But somehow I couldn't bring myself to.

"Well, who are you? Or more accurately who **were** you?" the voice pushed, not willing to wait any longer for my answer.

"A murderer."

_A murderer. _ The words echoed through my head cruelly. _No, it can't be. He may be a scatterbrain, but surely he couldn't be something like that, could he? No, he couldn't be._ I had watched him these past few weeks and was simply not that type of person. There was something inside of him that was, well innocent. _Do not let your feelings control your actions._ I heard my mother's voice pop into my head, but for once I did not heed her.

"NO! I refuse to believe that you are that heartless! You are going to tell me what happened to you, everything that has happened. We can decide if you are a despicable killer afterward and take the proper course of action. But first who are you? Not your name not your rank but as a person who are you? What is your history? Why do you believe you're a murderer?"

"Because I am." He answered simply Fatima was about to reply back but he cut her off. "My name, as you know is James Hook, I was born on October seventeenth to Elena Hook the young wife of the now deceased William A. Hook. My mother was a young noblewoman whose parents wished to take control of London. In an effort to accomplish this they married her off at seventeen to the aging admiral William Hook, a prominent figure in the government. My mother despised my father more than I've ever seen a human being hate before and when I was born that hatred carried over to me."

* * *

_A/N Okay so I know I promised you guys at least five chapters when I came back and I intend to make good on it, but my mother gave my laptop back earlier than expected. So here is the next ridiculously short installment of tis better to have loved and lost… a fair warning to all of you out there it's going to get pretty angsty. But in this story Hook has the most pathetic history ever so he has a right to feel horrible about it. On another note, during a conversation earlier to day with aforementioned mother I came up with the best word, Snarkasm! It's like snarky and sarcastic combined! So enjoy and as always review!_

_Reviewers I'd like to thank this chapter…_

_LadyLioness: Thank you so much for your review! Your unfailing support in my first two attempts at fanfiction is amazing and means much more to me than I can ever express. As to you your comment about Fatima, yes she was supposed to be more passive than she turned out. But she came out kicking and I didn't really want to fight her. I look forward to your next review, _

_Animetor777_

_zeldapan: I haven't seen you before but thank you so much for your review! I'm glad that you have enjoyed the story so far and hope to see more from you in the future. I'm one of those freaks for whom one review can make my entire week, so thank you. Also I want you and any other readers to know that I am always open to comments, questions, ideas and suggestions for how to make my stories and writing better. So thanks again and (hopefully) see you soon,_

_Animetor777_


	3. Chapter 3

A/N _Italics=_thoughts and memories and flashbacks.

I had never felt more free. Telling someone, anyone about all of the trials of my childhood was liberating in a way I couldn't possibly have imagined. But especially telling Fatima. When I told her of how I grew up of how my mother hated me for my father who avoided her like the plague and only tolerated my presence, I felt like she wasn't just listening because she pitied me but that she actually cared and wanted to repair the damage caused by those years. Like she was an endless cavern into which I could pour all of my woes and she would always accept them and find away to release them into a place where they couldn't harm me any longer.

"My father as I said was an admiral and as I was growing up he was almost constantly at sea. That was what inspired me when I was sixteen to join the navy. It seems…. Childish now but I thought that if I could become successful in the same way that he had that perhaps I could earn his love. Stupid of me. Success doesn't buy a parent's love, it only gives them something to brag about when their spending their time at home drinking with their superiors." Fatima winced at the bitterness in his voice the raw pain that was there. The healer in her cried out to help him, cure him, do something.

"Many of us try to win other's affections in the most ridiculous of ways. Until we learn that true affection, true love cannot be won." I looked into his blue eyes that were for once alight with acceptance and understanding. I leaned closer in our faces mere inches from each other I closed my eyes and removed my head scarf…. when Zaifel burst into the room. We leapt apart as though jolted by lightening.

"What on earth is going on here?!" Zaifel squawked indignant "Fatima you know what his people did! How could you betray your tribe like this? It is an outrage! When the chief hears of this you will be finished! I told you a woman could not make it alone, we all did. But would you listen? Of course not! Well Fatima you were too stubborn for your own good. Now you. Are . Through!" Zaifel stormed toward the door Hook tried to after him but collapsed onto the bed in a fit of pain. They heard the swish of the fabric as he walked out. Fatima crumpled to the floor thinking this meant the end for her.

"I would not advise telling the chief about this little incident Zaifel. Fatima was just checking Captain Hook's wounds, weren't you, Fatima?" Nom stepped calmly into the room holding Zaifel by the arm twisted behind his back, his hazel eyes giving her a pointed look. A disbelieving smile spread across Fatima's face. She returned his gaze evenly and answered,

"Yes. I was just checking the patient to see if the infection had returned." Knowing that Zaifel was caught and he couldn't sweet talk his way into making this a scandal Fatima allowed her smile to bloom in full.

"And has the infection returned?" Nom asked more out of politeness than any real concern. He was confident in her healing abilities.

"No. He is as healthy as could be expected now and is on the track to a full recovery."

"Good. Then as you have no further work here I suggest you get some rest."

Fatima nodded and left the room. She still couldn't believe how close that had been. Had Nom not come in when he had she didn't know what she would have done. Well that's not quite true. If Nom hadn't come Zaifel would have gone and told the chief that she had fallen for the patient whereupon Hook would have been cast out into the desert to die and she would have never healed anyone again. But the whole notion that she had fallen in love with her patient was ridiculous. She couldn't have. Zaifel was right about that. _Not after what they have done to me._

_Suddenly she was eleven years old again and flame and smoke surrounded her. She heard the screams and saw the dancing faces of the soldiers with too pale skin. She ran her feet pounding the hard desert dirt desperately searching for her parents, her brothers her sisters. But she could not find them. She fell to the ground in a fit of coughing and knew no more._

Fatima shook her head to clear her thoughts of the memories. True Zaifel was somewhat correct she had not fallen in love with her patient but she was fond of him. like a younger sister to her older brother, or like a daughter to her father. Yes, that was it he was like a father to her, albeit a very sad and hurt father, but a father nonetheless and it had been a long while since she had had a father.

_

* * *

  
_

"Now Zaifel. I'll tell you what you're going to do. You're going to go back to your tent and pretend this was all a dream. Or, you could go to the chief tell him what you've seen however you want, be disproven by me and have a lot more than a sore shoulder to worry about, it's your choice." Nom released Zaifel who promptly spit on the ground next to his feet and stormed off to his tent. There was a moment of silence between the two men left in the infirmiry with tension that could be cut with a knife. Hook caught Nom's eyes and said,

"I don't often say this but thank you."

"I didn't do it for you. I did it for Fatima. And I'm trying to keep her well so I would appreciate it if you didn't get her into more trouble. I love her and if you mess up her life any more than you already have **I** will report you to the chief. Understand?" Hook nodded. "Good." Nom turned to leave when Hook called after him

"If you love then why haven't you married her? Isn't that what you do when you care about a woman?"

"Because it would be an insult to her family." Nom answered stiffly.

"Why?"

"Because my father was an English Soldier." With that Nom exited the room leaving Hook to his swirling out of control thoughts.

_A/N Well it's short and probably incredibly craptastic but it's an update. I'd like to apologize for being away for so long. I'll tell you what happened. First my computer broke while my dad was on a business trip and neither my mom, brother or I had any idea how to fix it so I had to wait a week until he got back. Then he "fixed" it but really only made it worse and so we had to take it to our friend who is a tech wizard to fix it. Long story short I only got it back earlier tonight. But fear not I have not been idle these past few weeks. I have several chapters planned out and a few written so I will be updating very soon, namely tomorrow so good night and I hope you didn't all leave because of the extreme lateness of this update._

_Reviewers I'd like to thank this chapter,_

_LadyLioness, Thank you for staying with me despite sporadic updates and sometimes truly lousy chapters. Of course I'm going to respond to your comments and questions, I love talking to my readers, it reassures me that someone actually cares about what I'm writing other than my self. Which to put it in the most cheesy manner possible, gives me a warm fuzzy feeling inside. And thank you for the recommendation of Peter Pan in Scarlet, I'll have to look into it. Until next time,_

_Animetor777_


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N italics=thoughts, flashbacks and dreams._

_An English Soldier! But how is that possible? Nom is at least twenty years old. I had just become a sea captain then and there were __**no**__ reports of soldiers in this area. It's impossible! Unless they were on leave, but then who would come all the way out here just for some fun? There isn't even a decent tavern and where else would they spend their time?_ Hook's thoughts swirled around forming circle after circle of perplexing annoyingly inconclusive thought, until he slipped into an uneasy sleep filled with incomprehensible dreams.

_Hook awoke to the infirmary but he was no longer ill. He sat up and feeling no pain made his way through the door. He blinked in the bright sun that glared down on him from above. When his vision cleared he saw that the center of the village was strangely busy with none of the hustle and bustle of usual every day life. "Hello." Hook walked around the corner searching for somebody, anybody. "Is anybody there?" he called out, a cry that fell upon the deaf desert sand. He kept on walking and stumbled upon a crowd of people. Everyone in the village was there. Hook didn't recognize the ceremony but somehow he knew it was a wedding. He looked around for the happy couple and found..... _

"_NO! FATIMA! DON'T LEAVE ME! FATIMAAAA!"_

"Captain Hook! Captain Hook! Wake up! You're dreaming! James I'm here!" Hook awoke with a start to Fatima shaking him and calling out his name. "James I'm here and I'm not going anywhere." Hook took a few breaths to calm himself and then asked attempting to sound calm and under control,

"What time is it?"

"Around midnight. I heard you screaming and came running. Will you be all right now?" Fatima's eyes searched Hook's face for some sign that he wasn't going to scream again.

"Yes. I think so. Bad dream. I'm sorry I woke you." Hook's eyes finally relaxed and became gentle with remorse. The healer in Fatima recognized a recovery and she went back to business.

"Right, well you need a change of bandages anyway so I'll go get some fresh ones and be right back okay?" Hook nodded and she left the room.

_Idiot! How could you start calling out her name like that? She probably thinks that you're a nutcase stalker now as well as a murderer. You don't even love her you love Briar. Nom loves her. Great job. Absolutely brilliant. She's probably laughing at you right now_._ Fabulous now I have another voice to tell me how much I screwed up. Oh and talking to yourself is supposed to make things better? Stop it! Shut up! If you weren't speaking I wouldn't be talking to myself now would I? Fine I'll go but you know I'm right. Yeah yeah, brilliant deduction Sherlock Holmes. Genius. _Having finished doing battle with his own personal sarcasm society Hook lay looking at the ceiling until Fatima came back in. Predictably the Creosote stung as it soaked into his wounds. But now that he knew what to expect he didn't cry out in pain. Fatima dressed his wounds and turned to leave when Hook called her back, "Wait, Fatima, I never got to finish telling you my story."

"That is true. Well while I'm here. Continue."

"I joined the navy when I was sixteen. It took me four years but eventually I became a captain in the Queen's navy. I was finally free. Sailing the world in a ship of my own with a crew of good men under me and the wind at my back. I saw every port in which the British had contact. Peru, Africa, Australia and India. It was in the Indian port of Bombay that I met Briar. I loved her from the moment I saw her shining grey eyes peering inquisitively out of her small pale face framed by shining ringlets of fire. It took her a bit longer to care for me but eventually she did. And that was it she **did** care. She loved me for who, not what I was. She didn't care if I were a rich man or a pauper. She could care less about status and for that I loved her. She was sweet and pure and everything that I had never seen. I took leave and spent the entire year courting her. We just fell more and more deeply in love and on May twenty first on the first fine day of spring I married her. I had never then or since seen a more beautiful sight then my Briar walking down the aisle in a dress of snow and satin. She refused to stay in Bombay while I sailed the world and I couldn't leave the navy and so she came with me. And a year into our marriage we were blessed with a son. We named him Nathanial. I loved him more than I could ever express, loved both of them more than I could ever show. And for two years we were amazingly, beautifully happy." Here Hook paused as if steeling himself for painful memories.

"But it didn't last." Fatima stated more of a confirmation than a question, Hook shook his head sadly.

"There was a powerful storm one of the worst I've ever seen. The rain poured onto the deck in sheets and the wind tore at the few sails we had left up. I was at the prow trying desperately to steer us into safety. And my boy, my Nathanial somehow got up on deck. No one was quite sure how but he did. And as difficult as it was for me to hang on it was ten times harder for him. He fell overboard and the wind yanked us far away from him. Briar was yelling at me to stop, to turn back. But I knew that even if I were to turn back we wouldn't find him and I couldn't risk everyone else's life for his when he was probably already lost. In a fit of rage and desperation Briar jumped after him. Had I known what she would do I would have had someone restrain her as she wasn't in her right mind. But I didn't know, didn't act and so lost her. In one night I had lost the two greatest loves of my life. After that I returned to England. I stopped coming when summoned and the navy abandoned me. For the next year of my life I frequented taverns drowning my sorrows in booze and cheap entertainment. I was set on course to kill myself this way when an old man came up to me and asked me if I wanted to see them again. And well, you can imagine what my answer was."

_I downed my fifth pint of beer and was about to leave when I saw a shriveled old man come up next to me. We sat in silence for a moment before he rasped, "Hello there young man, you have lost much, haven't you?"_

"_What's it to you?" I slurred groggily._

"_I see, you have lost your wife and child. Yes tragic wasn't it."_

"_How could you possibly know that?" I could feel my anger starting to rise and some inner voice told me to calm down, that he wasn't worth it._

"_I have my ways. But the important thing is, would you like to see them again?"_

"_More than anything in this world." I answered honestly._

"_Then find Neverland and you will see them once more." _

"I never saw where he went after that but I felt a stirring in my soul that told me that I needed to find this Neverland that he had spoken of. For even the slightest chance that I might see Briar and Nathanial again was enough to stir me to action. I went home and got myself clean and sober and a week later returned to the Navy base to request my old job back. Seeing that I was clean and had a gleam in my eye again they granted my request for a ship and crew and within two weeks of my meeting with the man I was on the open sea once more. But this time rather than doing routine military checks I was searching for Neverland. At first it seemed like there were no leads to find this Neverland. But I redoubled my researching efforts and found some. By then most of the men believed we were chasing a fairytale. But still all went well for a time. However no ship can sail indefinitely without new supplies. And as I had spent all of our funds on old tomes describing a magical island where laughter lives and children never grow old there was only one option, piracy. At first many of the men were uncomfortable with this idea but were desperate enough to go through with it anyway and they got used to it. We all did. Before long this became our way of life. And I became crueler and more bitter with every ship we attacked. I began to enjoy ripping away children and wives as my wife and child had been taken from me. I began to relish the fighting and lived so I could see the next battle. I am not proud of what I did during that time, I murdered, I stole, I lied, I cheated, I raped, attacked and pillaged all that I could and was happy about it. No, I am not proud of what I did then but it was this path that eventually led me to Neverland. When I got there I had never seen a more beautiful place. But it soon turned ugly to me as I realized that this was not the land that the old man had promised to me. Briar and Nathanial were not here, they never had been and they never would be. I had spent ten years trying to find this place and it too had betrayed me. I finally had to accept that I would never see them again. I saw the lost boys and the Indians happy and I hated them for it. I saw Peter Pan happiest of all and hated **him** the more for it. What right had he to be happy while I suffered and my loves were gone? What right had he? And then after all of the traps I set and plots I make he commits the greatest offense of all he falls in love! Love that had twisted me into what I was healed him and made him more joyous than ever. I knew that I had to capture his love. Take her away as mine had been. And so I did. But the boy just couldn't accept this, heroic as he was and so he rescued her and sent me back out into the cold, unfeeling ocean. It took me five years to return to the island and I thought I could finally make myself happy if only monetarily. I stole the natives belief, sucked their souls straight out of them and would have continued to do so for much longer had Pan's daughter not arrived on the scene and stopped me. My own crew sent me out to rot with a rowboat and a single oar. I spent weeks drifting aimlessly when my rowboat was torn apart in a storm much like the one that took my Briar and Nathanial away from me. After which I assume that you found me and took me here. Now, you know my story. Judge me as you will."

_A/N Phew! A decently long chapter at last! Took me long enough didn't it! Well I kept my promise I did post another chapter today it is now 11:50 pm which means that it's technically still today for another ten minutes. I apologize that it's a bit late but I got to spend my day getting poked with needles. Happy happy joy joy. But anyway here you go the latest installment of Tis Better to have Loved and Lost. And now you know why I named this story that. I hope to hear from you,_

_Animetor777_


	5. Chapter 5

_You've ruined it. Now that she's learned about the monster I was,…am she will never return. _In his mind Hook could see the events of last night. He had finished telling his story and up until that point he had been lost in the memories. Memories dancing on the edges of his vision as he told about them. Laughing, teasing, ever evasive, Briar's face, the exact color of Nathanial's curls, at first he drew a blank in response to this information. But then in a rush of swirling color he remembered with startling clarity. After a while he almost didn't realize that he was still talking, narrating the story that went with the images in his mind. After a time he must have stopped as the memories had run out. Like a film whose tape had all been unrolled the pictures in his mind stopped; like a book after turning the last page he had no more story to tell. He remembered asking Fatima to judge him as she would. Remembered her looking shocked and faintly disgusted. Remembered her being stunned, for once, into silence and remembered the revulsion with which she looked at him after hearing what he had done. Slowly she rose turned her back on him and left. Hook let her go, knowing that yelling after her would do no good, feeling that though it stung to be abandoned he deserved what he got. At some point he must have fallen asleep for how else could he have woken in the morning. His wounds were bathed and dressed, Fatima must have come by earlier than she usually did, before he woke. _She doesn't even want to see me. She's only coming because she is required by her duties to heal me. Nice job, now you've once again driven off the one person who actually cared what happened to you. _ The rest of the day continued in a similar manner. Fatima did not return to deliver his meals as she usually did but rather sent a young girl to him with dark untrusting eyes. She set down his food and left bowing out the door and ignoring all of his requests to speak to or even see Fatima. He kept himself awake for as long as he could hoping to catch her when she came in to change his bandages but eventually he drifted off into sleep and when he awoke once more it was to an empty room and clean bandages. He swore and cursed using words that I do not care to repeat here. And so it continued the same pattern over and over days turning into weeks in uneventful frustration until.

"What did you do to her?!" Nom burst through the door an enraged hornet itching to sting. Having been sleeping Hook woke with a start to face a youth just about ready to boil over. "Answer me damn it what did you do?"

"What did I do about what?" Hook posed the question although he bet he knew the answer. But as he had not spoken in weeks he wanted to prolong any contact with people for as long as possible.

"What did you do to Fatima? I leave her hear fiery and wild but happy and I come back from the hunting trip to find her listless and depressed. Now what. Did. You. Do?!" Nom didn't know why exactly Fatima's listlessness enraged him all he knew was that it did and that it wasn't and that this man was to blame.

"I don't know why she's upset I haven't seen her for almost three months. All I 'did' was I told her the story of my life at her request and since then she's been avoiding me like the plague." Nom took a step forward and lifted Hook by his collar.

"I don't know why she's so upset by your life story but I know that somehow it's your fault. So you're going to apologize and try to earn her forgiveness, though I doubt you'll succeed. But you're still going to try, got it?" Nom glared at Hook daring him to challenge this proposal.

"Oh I'll gladly apologize," Hook began sardonically, "There's just one little problem, I **never** see her!"

"Frankly I don't really care you're going to find a way to and beg for her forgiveness. She has already suffered enough at your hands." Nom released Hook and was walking away when Hook asked him,

"What do you mean by that?" With a measured air Nom slowly turned around and spat,

"Her family burned because of **you**." He then left the room leaving behind him a trail of morbid curiosity.

* * *

Fatima didn't know exactly why she left him that night. But she did know why she avoided him over the following days and weeks. **He** was the pirate the British soldiers had been looking for when they had burned down her village. **He** was the reason that her family was dead. The thought set her blood to a boil, yet at the same time it sickened and chilled her heart. _Why Lord? Why? I don't know how much more of this I can take. I trusted him. Even as he had committed the greatest betrayal I cared about his welfare. I even thought that maybe, someday he might have been willing to go through the ceremonies necessary to give me a father again and to grant him a daughter, and now this? Why?! Why me? _A gentle hand on her shoulder woke her from her trance.

"Fatima. Are you all right?" Nom asked knowing perfectly well she wasn't but not knowing what else to say.

"No Nom, I'm not." Fatima answered in a tired deeply saddened voice. And then breaking all protocol she rose and collapsed into him burying her face in his chest and refusing to let go. Nom wrapped his arms around her as if this simple act could protect her from all harm. Tears streamed down Fatima's face staining Nom's robe but he didn't care, he just rubbed calm reassuring circles on her back and let her release the pain she had kept pent up for so many years. At some point she collapsed to the ground and Nom went with her refusing to let her fall. Finally she finished crying and fell asleep. Nom picked her up and gently carried her to her room. He placed her on the bed, carefully covered her with her soft fur blanket and pulled a chair up next to the bed. He sat down clasped her hand in his and stroked it attempting to calm her furrowed brow. He fell asleep with their fingers intertwined.

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_A/N Well there you go chapter 5. It's not as long as I would have liked but still something is better than nothing right? I still owe you guys four chapters, but as my runaway muse has returned that should be happening over the next few weeks. Well for me summer is over which means more school work but it also means that I won't be gone almost constantly like I was over the summer I literally only had free time over the day before yesterday and today and that was taken up with pre AP bio homework. I got back a few days ago but then had to get surgery done on my feet and so I was too out of it to write. and then my mom stole my laptop again and told me I couldn't have it back until I finished a good portion of my bio homework. so yeah. anyway over the school year I have made a goal for myself to try and get at least one new chapter posted every two weeks. I hope to hear from you,_

_Animetor777_

_Reviewers I'd like to thank_

_LadyLioness: As ever your continued support inspires me to write. Thank you and I hope to see you soon.  
_


	6. Chapter 6

Fatima blearily opened her eyes to the moonlight streaming through the flap leading into her home. She blinked several times trying to clear the sleep from her eyes. Glancing around the room she tried to remember what had happened, but failed, until she caught sight of Nom kneeling by her bed fast asleep head resting peacefully on the mattress, fingers intertwined with her own. In a rush everything that had happened came back to her. She heard the voices of her old masters taunting her, _you are weak Fatima, weak. Can't even contain a little fear and sadness. You will never be a true member of this tribe, __**never**__. The Kahdoak people do not lose themselves to their emotions in such a selfish display, it is weak, __**you**__ are weak. What would your father say?_ She denied it but somewhere inside her she agreed with them. She gently pulled her fingers loose from Nom's and sat up. Seated on the edge of her bed she coaxed her hair into the usual braid and tucked it into her head scarf. Grabbing her medical bag she started to leave but then she caught sight of Nom and stopped. "Thank you." She whispered and then headed out the door glancing up at the sky she judged the time to be an hour or so shy of dawn. _With any luck it's still early enough that that traitor won't be awake yet. _She marched towards the infirmary with a reserved anger. Once there she opened the flap carefully so as not to make any noise. With the speed and accuracy of one who has repeated the same action hundreds of times Fatima redressed Hook's bandages. She went to the door and breathed a sigh of relief that she had not woken him up. She started to leave when,

"Fatima, wait. Please." Fatima's eyes narrowed into a glare, but without so much as a glance back she spat,

"I have nothing to say to you traitor."

"Fatima, no please, don't go I need to apologize to you, Fatima don't go." But his cries fell on deaf ears, in a last ditch effort he cried, "Fatima please, Nom asked me to talk to you." Fatima stopped, with calculated slowness she turned around to face him.

"And why would he ask you to do that?"

"Because he cares about you and is worried and, I owe you an apology. I owe you more than that but as of now that is all that I can offer. Fatima, I am so sorry that your family burned because of me, sorrier than you will ever know, please Fatima I know it isn't much and I should burn in hell for all eternity for the things I have done, but that at least was unwittingly done and not in my control, so please, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the pain and the grief I must have caused you and I know this can't erase it but I needed to tell you that I'm so sorry."

"And do you think that this somehow changes things? Do you think that your **apology**," she spat the word out like a foul bug, "will bring my family back? My father? My mother? My brothers and sisters? NO! As far as I'm concerned your **apology** is worthless, it doesn't change **anything**!" with that she stormed off.

"Fatima! Please don't go! Please give me a chance to earn your forgiveness!"

"I'm terribly **sorry**," she spat, "but I don't forgive **murderers**." And then she was gone leaving an icy chill and a hollow captain in her place.

* * *

In some part of her Fatima regretted the things she'd said to him but she was unwilling to let go. She had searched for years to find the reason why her family had died, but had never found it. She had tried hating the white people and blaming them as the rest of her tribe had done, yet she could not bring herself to condemn an entire race of people for what one person had done. Not with scum like Zaifel around to show her how one person could never hope to be and example of an entire people. So without a reason or someone to blame for her family's death, Fatima hid her feelings away, locked her anger away in the deepest depths of her soul, where it couldn't hurt her, or so she thought. Within her the anger ate away at her, she became bitter and numb, rebelling wherever she could just to feel something. She went to live with the elders who taught her the art of healing. But then when she grew up she refused to do anything that would gain her acceptance into the tribe as was proper. She refused to marry and refused to become a priestess. This earned her the scorn and even hatred of most of the tribe. She was only allowed to live with them still because they needed her. The previous healer had died shortly after completing Fatima's training. And now that she had finally found someone to blame for all of her hurt and anger she was not about to just forgive him for everything she had gone through, no not yet, not ever. She would send her apprentice to him for his healing and she would never have to look at his traitorous countenance ever again.

* * *

Hearing his own words spat back at him with an acidic venom was more painful to Hook than any wound he had received. Finally he had thought he had found someone who could forgive him for all his wrongs, someone who he had never hurt. It's not that he wanted to replace Briar, far from it, he just wanted someone who was not disgusted by him, someone who understood. In fact to him Fatima was more like the child he had never gotten to raise than anything else. And he thought he had finally found someone who could perhaps ease the pain of losing his own child, just a little bit, someone who would think of him as a father and who would never blame him for some dark deed. But he had been dead wrong. Literally. Because of him her family lay in ashes and she had to fend for herself. And although he longed for her forgiveness he could not blame her for refusing to give it to him.

* * *

Fatima went as quickly as she could back to her home, left some instructions for her apprentice and grabbed her satchel. Stuffing it with extra clothes and a cloak she went out to the place where the horses were bedded down. She snatched a saddlebag from the rack it had been hanging on and filled with the necessities to survive in the desert alone. She mounted her horse and rode to the edge of town looking back at the village bathed in the pale orange glow of dawn and whispered "Forgive me Nom" with that she rode off into the deep Kahdoak desert.

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_A/N well finally here is the next chapter and dun dun dun, cliffie. I'm sorry for posting this late but I had to have surgery done on my feet, for the second time this summer, and was therefore too loopy to write. But anyway a thousand apologies and here you go._

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_Reviewers I'd like to thank_

_LadyLioness, yeah so Hook really does think of Fatima as a daughter and that's how I planned it, I'm sorry if I made it seem otherwise. But Nom does see him as competition as he is too thick to realize that Hook is only protective of her as a daughter. Hook himself was confused for a while about his feelings towards Fatima, but that was mostly because he'd forgotten what it was like to feel parental so yeah. But thank you for your suggestion anyway. In an earlier draft of this story I did have Hook falling in love with Fatima, but then I decided on a plot twist that will be coming up shortly that would make it impossible and really weird and wrong to have that happen so I revised it. As always thank you for your review, you truly inspire me to get the next chapter written and posted and it's readers like you that help me finish my stories, so thank you so much and I can't wait to hear from you again, Animetor777  
_


	7. Chapter 7

Fatima rode for several hours under the painfully, searing sun. Only stopping when it was high noon and she had found a small crevice in the stark landscape just large enough for her to fit herself and her horse inside while still having shade. In the distance she could see the austere mountains she was aiming for somewhere past the scattered with tawny boulders where she was now. _I should have covered more ground this morning._ She thought kicking herself for not galloping the entire way, _but if you had done that both you and the horse would be collecting maggots by now, _the more sensible part of her brain responded. _Oh well at least I was able to find someplace with shade, and now to sleep until dark and continue on then. _ She searched through her sack to pull out a large canteen filled with water. Taking as little as possible she let the sweet water wash over her parched tongue. She then removed the saddlebags, rubbed down the horse and bedded down to sleep away the rest of the cruel, unforgiving heat away.

* * *

Nom awoke expecting to find Fatima's sweet face greeting him, instead he found an empty bed and an open chest containing nothing. Desperately he searched for the place where she kept her survival equipment for herb gathering journeys, to his despair he found it empty. _No! Please no! Not this, not now._ With the rush of a madman he left Fatima's home, door flap flailing after the force of his exit. He stormed through the village, a factor four hurricane sending one message loud and clear, get out of my way. The hurricane paused for a moment in front of the infirmary, but decided that finding Fatima was more important than chewing out the despicable beast that had caused her to leave. In a rage he raced to the stables grabbed his horse and saddled it. He galloped out into the sweltering wasteland, the relentless wind bearing down upon him. The stormy clouds of sand coming up behind him.

* * *

Several hours later Nom was starting to question his judgment, or at least wish that he'd brought along some supplies. The sand storm had quickly caught up with him and if there was one thing that his elders had taught him it was this, never get caught in a sandstorm. The churning winds can easily pick up a human and carry them some distance before dashing them on the ground. Even in a minor storm tiny grains of sand traveling up to 70 miles an hour can do a fair bit of damage to soft, human skin. The best thing to do is to cover your face, hunker down behind a rock and stay there. Unable to find any shelter all Nom could do was watch as his visibility was reduced to next to nothing and wander around aimlessly hoping to find something to hide behind. All around him he could feel destructive forces at work, wild willful forces that wouldn't care one whit if he dashed to pieces against the small sharp stones at his feet. Despite this, even out in the open, Nom knew that he would come out of this relatively unscathed as long as he could keep his feet under him. He couldn't. The wind easily lifted him skyward then absentmindedly dropped him until another furious gale could pick him up again, only to toss him towards the earth like a toddler who has tired of a toy, fine for the toddler, not so nice for the toy. As he fell Nom could feel the sand chafing away layers of skin and giving him countless cuts and scrapes. Then he collided with the earth, muscles that had seemed so hard and strong that morning turned soft against the sharp, saber-like stones beneath him. He heard the sickening crunch of his leg breaking and felt his arm snap. For a moment he was awash in pain and then he knew know more.

* * *

Fatima had slept most of the day away and when she woke up she could hear the churning winds buffeting her small place of peace and calm. If she were out in it this storm would have her scared stiff, but as it was the squall mostly annoyed her. _Looks as if I won't be covering more ground today after all. _This worried her some as she only had a limited amount of supplies and she needed to reach the mountains before they ran out, but she was confident that the storm wouldn't last long, they usually didn't. Most sandstorms were horrible violent, but exceedingly short, all she had to do was wait out the storm and in a little while she would be able to continue on her journey. That was her plan, outlast the storm and continue on her way. Her plan, at least until the wind moved a stone and her safe-haven came crashing down around her.

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_A/N Mwahahah cliffie! Yes I know this is a very short chapter, but hey it's on time and better than nothing right? So here you go. Remember reviews make me happy, if I'm happy I right faster *hint hint* yes that was a weakly disguised attempt at bribery, but oh well. I hope to post the next chapter sometime next Monday so until then, thanks for reading and I hope to hear from you._

_Reviewers I'd like to thank_

_LadyLioness: Thank you so much for your continued support of my writing and it's nice to hear that my ideas are original. Sometimes I worry that I'm stealing too much from stories that I've loved and it's nice to hear that other people don't think so. You should post your story I'll be sure to read and review if you do, you'll have to tell me what it's called so I can find it though, but it's the least I could do after all of your support through both of my major stories. So thank you and I look forward to reading your story._

_Animetor777_


	8. Chapter 8

Small stones cascaded around her as the boulders crashed past, flattening anything in their way. A slab of limestone twice the size of herself rolled within inches of her almost crushing her, succeeding in crushing her horse. She could only allow for a moment of mourning before she had to dodge and jump past the flying rock following gravity out and into the tempest of sand. Once there she looked back on the body of her companion, vowing to return and properly bury her when she could. She covered her face tears soaking her indigo head scarf. She was so blinded by her overpowering grief that it took her a moment before she realized that she had lost more than her horse in the cave in, she had lost her supplies. If there is one thing worse than being trapped in a sandstorm, it is being trapped in a sandstorm without a horse or supplies. Much as she wanted to mourn both the loss of Admina and her supplies, Fatima knew that her best chance of survival was to start heading back in the direction of the village and hope to find a rock to hunker down behind and wait for the storm to pass. And so this is what she did.

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Several hours later when the sun was starting to sear everything underneath it's massive gaze this didn't seem like such a good idea anymore. A voice in her head mockingly told her of her fault in all of this _you caused this Fatima, if you hadn't left then Admina would still be alive and you wouldn't be out wandering the desert without anything with which to survive, it's your fault. Your fault. Your fault. _ And though she wished with all of her being that she could deny it she knew that it was true. She felt emotions rush through her in a sickening gut twisting knot, anger, grief, lonliness, guilt, fury she yelled to the open sky "YOU WERE WRONG ELDERS! COWARDS SUPRESS THEIR EMOTIONS, IT'S HARDER TO FEEL, IT TAKES COURAGE TO FEEL!! It takes courage to feel" with this as her mantra Fatima found within herself a new iron strength, and an overpowering will to live. Until she saw a sight that made her boiling blood run cold. She found Nom lying underneath a layer of sand covering him softly, almost like a blanket. As she moved closer she saw that he was battered and bloody, his entire body covered in small cuts and scrapes, with larger deeper gashes scattered amidst them. And then she noticed his arm and leg. Lying at awkward unnatural angles, it was quite clear that they were broken. His upper arm was a sickly green and his leg was already leaking pus, both clear signs of a deep and rabid infection. Fatima could feel her blood pounding as fear overtook her, "No Nom please, please don't be dead. Nom" she sobbed collapsing over him in a gentle embrace. He groaned. "You're alive, oh spirits be praised your alive."

"Yes barely." He croaked out. She saw his horse nervously pawing the ground at her proximity. An Idea sprung to her head.

"Nom you need a healer, you need me, and I need my herbs which are back home. I'm going to move you, it will hurt probably worse than anything you've ever felt before but it's necessary, so please just, try to stay conscious." Nom nodded, all he was able to do and even that brought a wince of pain. She pulled him somehow managing to get him over to his horse. But then how to proceed, what with his height advantage and muscle mass Nom had at least fifty pounds on her and with him being so injured she couldn't bump him in any way. She tried to lift him but within about ten seconds of trying it was clear that she was never going to be able to get him up onto the horse. She couldn't do it, Nom would die. Unless… thinking quickly she untied her bright indigo headscarf and lashed it to a tall thin stone near them. "I won't abandon you, but you will die unless you get some herbs, fast I'm going to ride back to the village and come back as quickly as I can. Alright?" it wasn't really a question she was going to do it no matter what he said, but she could see in his eyes that he agreed with her that this was the only way. She mounted Nom's horse and she was off in a cloud of sand and dust. Nom watched her ride out until he the sand swallowed her up and he lost all sight of the woman he loved and he was left alone with the searing pain that was coursing through his body, agrivated with each tiny movement, each breath. _Please Fatima, hurry._

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Fatima rode bent over Efrem the two becoming almost seamless in their urgency to save his master. She could feel his powerful legs pounding beneath her as the land disappeared under them. She urged him faster, pushing him beyond any speed he had previously known. She knew that each minute that passed Nom's life was slipping away and that only she could save him. _He must have gone after you Fatima, that's why he is where he is now, yet another thing to add to your tally of crimes, Admina's death, your loss of precious supplies, and now Nom's death as well. No I won't let that happen, not now, not ever._ Efrem pounded ever onward until finally she could see a blurry outline of the village. She pushed him even faster for the last burst and she was there. "Good job Efrem, you were wonderful." But the task wasn't over yet she ran into her home grabbing everything she could possibly need, creosote and mesquite to drive out infection, agave to relieve pain and jojoba to soothe the scrapes and burns from the storm. She also grabbed fresh bandages and a stretcher to carry him back on. She then ran to the stables and grabbed a fresh horse, knowing that Efrem wouldn't make it. She had no idea whose horse she had grabbed and right now she didn't really care. She attached the stretcher to the horse and mounted racing out of the town leaving a cloud of sand and dust behind her.

* * *

She had been riding for an hour or so when she saw her scarf flapping in the wind. She urged the horse onward arriving back next to Nom finally. Not even bothering to properly dismount she leaped off the horse taking her supplies with her. Quickly she found Nom's waterskin and uncorking it she gently washed out his wound. She broke up several creosote and mesquite leaves and left them to soak in the water with the cloth and bandages then went to set his arm and leg. She straightened out his arm as gently and carefully as she could but she still heard his hiss of pain and his groan as she pushed the bones back together. She took a stiff hide and lay it against the bone on either side to keep it straight, then wrapped the soaked bandages around it as tightly as possible without cutting off circulation. Then she moved on to the leg. Carefully she cut away a small portion of puffy inflamed skin around the wound and drained the pus out of the wound pouring the creosote water over it to stave off new infection and fight the current one. Then she carefully edged the leg straight, Nom let out a cry of horrific pain and she was tempted to stop but knew that she couldn't. Once straight she repeated the process of stabilizing and wrapping the limb. With both broken limbs set she could move on to the less serious wounds. She thoroughly cleaned then bandaged all of his cuts and gently applied jojoba oil to all of his scrapes and burns to help them heal. Finally she gave him some agave broth to drink knowing that it would help keep the pain at bay now that she didn't need it to judge her setting. Somewhere in the midst of her ministrations Nom lost conciousness. She cleaned and packed up her supplies and then carefully dragged him onto the stretcher and lashed him in. Slowly, she started her journey back home, praying as she went to any spirit who she could think of for his survival.

_A/N well there you have it the next chapter, once again on time! What now I can actually write on time sometimes!! So yeah I wrote this as my own chronic hip pain woke me up in the middle of the night so I actually had somewhat of an idea of Nom's level of pain. Woop dee doo da so much fun (note sarcasm, I'm very sarcastic when my hip is bad). But at least it helped me to write. So remember read, enjoy and please review, thanks,_

_Animetor777_

_Reviewers I'd like to thank this chapter_

_LadyLioness, Thank you so much for the review! I really tried to work on the descriptions last chapter. My logic for why they would know about hurricanes is that although they are a desert tribe they do live near the ocean (Hook's washing ashore, British Soldiers etc.) and with the horses I found that in the desert they are the next most common riding animal after camels and as I have no idea how to ride, control or take care of a camel I opted for horses. But you are right that a camel probably would have been more practical. And of course I read what you write. Reviews on my stories are sometimes what makes it possible for me to continue them and that you take the time to review means so much to me!! So thank you and I hope to hear from you soon._


	9. Chapter 9

The journey home seemed to take longer than any other trip she had ever taken. Fatima had to steer the horse carefully and slowly so as not to cause Nom any unnecessary pain. The desert sun seemed to catch the very air on fire as it blurred the sky into the horizon. But somehow Fatima was able to keep her head and sense of direction. By the time the sun was slowly sinking below the horizon they had reached the village, evident by the firelight dancing and chasing the shadows into oblivion. All Fatima wanted to do was bring Nom safely into the infirmary, change his bandages and crash. Unfortunately this was not to be so. A smirking Zaifel greeted her at the edge of town.

"So you've finally decided to return to your duties, and look you've brought the Halfling with you, how convenient." Fatima was in no mood to deal with such a pompous jerk,

"What are you talking about Zaifel, I've only been gone a few days."

Zaifel clucked his tongue disapprovingly, "The Elders are very disappointed in you Fatima, shirking your responsibilities, running away from home, refusing to fulfill your duties as a Kahdoak woman. They are very disappointed indeed. And as for the Halfling, well he had no right to go after you without permission from the council of Elders. As a result the elders wanted me to meet you at the gate to inform you that you are both banished."

"That's ridiculous Zaifel. I want to speak with the Elders myself. They wouldn't banish me, at least not until I had finished training Nimra. And Nom, he's probably the best warrior this village has." Zaifel gave her a mocking bow.

"As you wish, my lady." He started walking towards the Elder's chambers, seeing no choice Fatima led the horse she had ridden home on along with Nom to the chambers.

The Elder's chambers, reflected Fatima upon entering, were dark and oppressive and somehow….stiff in feeling. Almost as if to reflect the Elders' views. As her eyes grew accustomed to the dim lighting inside she could see through the pipe smoke that they were ornately decorated, with as much gilt and jeweled craft as possible. Zaifel was the first one to speak.

"Lady Fatima, daughter of Mylon, healer, come to see you about the terms of her banishment, Elders." With that he bowed stiffly and left the tent, but not before giving Fatima a gloating smirk.

"Fatima, what happened? Did we not train you to follow your duties as a woman and healer? How could you so directly disobey our laws?" a dry crone, with a crooked nose questioned her.

"Most honored Elders, if I could have a chance to explain myself, I was confused. You've always taught us not to let our emotions get the better of us, I did. And" she hated herself for saying it, "I will not allow this to happen again. I know that the usual punishment for this kind of behavior is banishment, but if I may be frank, you need me. Please do not blame Nom for my actions, he was only trying to bring an unruly tribeswoman home." She bowed formally and awaited their judgment knowing that there was nothing else that she could do and that her fate was up to them now. One second passed, another, Fatima could feel the sweat forming on her brow as her hands became numb with fear. Though they had not said anything, the elders seemed to have reached a conclusion.

"Fatima you speak the truth when you say that we need you and your healing abilities. But still there should be some punishment for your actions." Relief flooded through Fatima as she understood that she and Nom were not to be banished.

"Elders I will accept whatever punishment you wish me to endure, but please first let me get Nom stable."

"Agreed." Fatima bowed once more before leaving with Nom and the horse. She took him as quickly as she could to the infirmary, lay him in a bed and changed his bandages. She applied every salve and ointment that she thought might help him until there was nothing more she could do. Nothing left to do but wait. She hated waiting.

* * *

When Nom opened his eyes to the world again it took him a moment to realize where he was. He looked around, nervously searching for Fatima.

"She's gone to fetch fresh supplies she'll be back soon. She hasn't left your side until now, and only now because she ran out of things to treat you with. She must really love you." A dark voice came from the opposite side of the tent, Nom whirled around to face, Hook.

"And what would you know about love, pirate?" Nom spat contemptuously.

"More than you would guess, Nathanial."

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_A/N dun dun dun. I know it's a pretty crappy chapter, but the last two have been so action oriented that I wanted something calmer to go in between, but there's some drama coming up. And if your wondering about Nathanial, in case you forgot, refer to chapter 4 to know who he is. As always thank you for reading and I look forward to your comments._

_Reviewers I'd like to thank_

_LadyLioness: Thank you for your concern about my hip that's so kind of you! I know the descriptions of Nom's pain were pretty gross, but real pain is a part of this story and if I made you want to cringe that means that I've done my job. However I tried not to focus on it too much as it is not the main part of the story. But too often in stories where there is a healer the pain part of the illness or injury is glossed over as the healer magically makes the patient better. And while pain is never enjoyable to write or read about it is, I believe a necessary part of any healing story. Thank you so much for your continued support and I hope to hear from you soon._


	10. Chapter 10

"Have you completely lost your mind?" Nom queried stressing the completely implying that he thought that Hook was already half way gone. "My name is Nom, not Nathanial." He heard a deep chuckle coming from the pirate.

"That's what you are known as now but you were once the son of a Navy captain named James Hook. You were lost at sea when you were only two years of age and now unbelievably, I've found you." Nom's eyes narrowed in anger,

"Well I'm sorry to disappoint you, sir, but there is no way I could be the child you're looking for. I was born here and even if I wasn't how could you possibly recognize me?" he argued refusing to accept someone who he saw as an enemy as a father.

"Please I would recognize those eyes, the perfect blend of Briar's and mine, anywhere and this," Hook gestured to a hardly noticeable birthmark underneath Nom's chin, "is a bit of a giveaway. Nathanial, Nom whatever you call yourself you're my son. Mine and Briar's." Nom sat in silence, contemplating what he had heard. A minute passed. Then ten. Finally he spoke up. Reaching deep into his robes he pulled out an old navy medal, that was scratched, but still shining.

"Then I suppose this belongs to you." Hook took the medal turning it over in his hands seeming to caress an old friend. His mouth fell open in an almost comical display of disbelief.

"Where did you get that?"

"I was told it was around my neck when they found me." Nom answered as taciturn as ever, turning away from his father now that his duty was done. Hook smiled. The first real smile in what seemed like forever. He had found his son, it didn't matter that said son hated him or that it would take years to repair the damage, he had found him and that was all that mattered.

* * *

"Nathanial this is getting to be ridiculous." Fatima stated, some anger putting an edge to her voice.

"Stop calling me that my name's Nom and it always has been." Nom replied irritated that she wouldn't just allow him to wallow.

"Fine Nom then, you still have to accept him as your father. He is your father and he is giving his all to try and make up the missed years to you, but you, you won't even give him a chance." Fatima pulled the bandaging a bit tighter than was strictly necessary.

"Fatima I've told you time and time again, I can't it's his fault that I grew up being hated, not for something I had done but for my blood. His fault that I never had a mother, a father, or even really a home. His fault that you're family was taken away from you. Fatima, how can you forgive him for that?" Fatima clenched her teeth, _stupid, you knew that he would throw that back in your face. Why did you even bring it up? _ Despite her anger at herself Fatima was able to stay calm and argued back in a controlled, cool tone,

"I have forgiven him because there is no purpose to holding grudges, what's done is done and staying angry won't change that. Also he wasn't directly responsible for what happened to me and my family, sure the soldiers were searching for him, but he didn't tell them to burn down the village and slaughter the people. As I recall they did that all on their own. And don't you think that I would love to hurt them for that? Don't you think that if I could rid the earth of them I would love to? But I wouldn't; all that would accomplish is the spread of more hatred and vengeance. Don't be hateful Nom, don't spread the horror of violence and anger further. Don't let it consume your soul." Fatima pleaded with him earnestly, trying to soothe the dark turmoil in his heart.

"But Fatima how? How can you ask me to forgive him, why should I?" he muttered bitterly consigning himself to hate his father for all eternity.

"Because he's your father. If I could speak to my father, even for a short time, no matter what he did I'd forgive him for it. But I will never have that chance. You do. You do and you're wasting it." She spat standing abruptly, tears streaming down her face. She set down the bowl of water she had been bathing his scrapes in and left, not even bothering to glance back.

"Fatima! Fatima wait! Don't go. FATIMA!!" Nom yelled to her, but she didn't respond. And as much as he loathed the prospect of it, he knew what he had to do to win her back. Forgive his father.

* * *

Weeks passed and he gradually earned back the strength he had lost with his illness. Hook was moved to another tent to finish healing and clear space in the infirmary. Finally one day when Nom was strong enough to walk he slowly made his way over to the tent where he knew his father to be. He took a deep breath steeling himself for his greatest challenge yet and entered. "Don't think that this means that I care for you, because I don't but, I am ready to forgive you…. Father." and with that the great Captain and later pirate Hook broke down. Tears fell down his face. Not tears of shock or pain, but tears of joy at his son's return, not only to life in general but to **his** life.

They spent the next few hours talking, filling each other in on all of the time they had missed. Hook telling Nom stories of his mother who he remembered only in fuzzy images of curtains of orange hair falling over his crib and a soft voice talking to him in soothing tones. Nom telling his father of his life here in the village and what he had learned from the elders who had raised him. And when they parted they had gained, if not a companionship, at least some understanding between father and son.

* * *

Later that day Fatima came to check Nom's wounds and change the bandages. He was about to tell her the good news when he noticed her lifeless eyes and morose expression. "Fatima, what's wrong." She turned her face away still, apparently, angry with him.

"It's not like you'd care, it's about your father." Nom's eyes widened with fear, based on her expression whatever this was it wasn't good.

"Fatima, I do care. What is it about my father?"

"The Elders have figured out that he's perfectly healthy and as he is no longer wounded they see no point in keeping him here any longer." Nom didn't quite understand but he definitely didn't like the direction this was headed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked praying she would say they were going to have him join a hunting party or something.

"They're going to send him out into the desert, and as Nymla's finished her training I'm to go with him." By this time the tears were falling freely from both of them. No one survived in the desert for long. No one.

_A/N Dun dun dun. Once again thank you for reading my story and I apologize for the crappiness of this chapter. But I do have a bone to pick with you guys. On the stats it says that I have 361 hits on this story but only 2 of you have reviewed thus far. Reviews are like food for authors and my muse is starving! So please review and to those of you who have, you guys rock!!_

_Reviewers I'd like to thank_

_LadyLioness yes I do like to throw twists in my stories that no one can see coming, keeps things interesting. I mean personally I hate reading stories where you know exactly what is going to happen next, I mean if you already know why bother reading? Anyway thank you so much for your continued support. _


	11. Chapter 11

No matter how long Nom spent trying to get out of the quagmire woven around them he could only ever think of one solution. Unfortunately this involved him and Fatima "rushing into things" as a parent might call it. Unfortunately it involved marriage. Not that he didn't want to marry her eventually, just that he hadn't even told her he loved her yet, had barely admitted it to himself, and marrying her now just didn't seem right. He didn't want anything to force her to say yes, he wanted her to agree or disagree completely freely, he didn't want to force her hand. Not that he could anyway but still. And so he racked his brain for another solution tried to come up with any way out of this that didn't involve putting a horrible rush on their relationship, but he couldn't find one. So eventually with only a week or so left before Fatima had to leave he decided that he had to tell her his solution. _This is going to go well. _He thought sardonically as he waited for Fatima to come see him to tend to his wounds as a condemned prisoner waits for their executioner. Finally after the agonizing time of having nothing to do but sit and wait she came. Her hair pulling itself loose from it's braid, her face unnaturally pale and gaunt with fear and stress. Her frightened appearance gave Nom all the strength he needed to go through with it. "Fatima. I know this is presumptuous of me but I can think of no other solution. But I want you to know that I'm not just doing this because of the council, I'm doing this because I want to, granted I would have liked some more time, but I can't have it so I'm doing….this." he breathed deeply as Fatima regarded him with suspicion, readying himself for the most difficult part. "Fatima, will you marry me?" for a moment it seemed as if all time had stopped, as if life itself were put on hold, like the moment of calm before a storm. And then all hell broke loose.

"**WHAT?!!!!" **Fatima screeched panic coursing through her system. _This is almost more terrifying than being told to leave the tribe._ The other part of her brain argued back, _oh please don't tell me you haven't even spared one thought towards this. You know that you have, you know that you have thought in this exact same way and that you've always wanted to marry him, the council just sped up the inevitable. _Her conscience was sounding suspiciously like her younger sister. _Shut up._ Was the earth shattering retaliation she came up with.

Fatima seemed to be fighting some sort of inner battle with herself. _Nice going there chief now you've scared her away for good._ Nom thought annoyed with himself. Finally after several agonizing moments that were laden with stress and worry, she seemed to have made up her mind, she turned to him her expression clear.

"I just have one question to ask of you before I answer, do you love me? I mean really and truly do you love me? or is it just that you don't want to lose your one ally in this tribe in this manner." She looked towards him, her eyes searching for an answer.

"Yes I do. More than the world, more than myself. Fatima you have been there for me when no one else has. Accepted me when everyone else was rejecting me. Told me in no uncertain terms when I was being a selfish idiot and needed to snap out of it. And just…been there for me when I needed you. So yes I love you and although I wish it didn't have to be now or in this manner, I can think of no one else who I would rather spend my life with." Finished with his little speech Nom waited for the answer to **his** question. Fatima seemed to contemplated a moment more, Nom's words sinking in. Then she answered simply.

"Yes. With all of my heart, yes." A joyous grin spread itself across Nom's face, and in a strange way he was almost grateful to the council, after all they had brought him and Fatima together at last.

* * *

_One week later_

_

* * *

  
_

Nom had wanted to announce their engagement right away but Fatima wanted to hold off to allow for preparations, after all according to tribal law a couple must only be engaged, not married for the law to take effect. The law that stated that a council could not split up a couple who were to be engaged or married. So when the council came to tell Fatima to hit the road they were in for a surprise.

They forced their way into the infirmary where Fatima was just giving Nom a once over before releasing him. She started and looked up when they came in.

"Fatima, you have dishonored your family and this tribe by acting out of your place, you are hereby banished." Though the voice of the chief elder was firm was there also a hint of….regret in his eyes?

"I'm afraid you can't do that, sir." Nom said in a calm even tone rising from the bed.

"And why not, may we ask?" the chief elder questioned his eyes narrowing in condescending anger.

"Because Fatima and I are engaged to be married. If you banish her you must also banish me." a smirk lit up his face. They would never get rid of him, he was the best hunter and warrior they had, if they got rid of him, they would never be able to replace him. The chief elder's face darkened slowly turning a sort of maroon color in rage. They were now untouchable and the chief elder, knew this fully.

"We are still banishing the Englishman. I hope you know your little ploy hasn't saved him." The council sneered condescendingly. Nom's only reaction to this was to widen his smile a glint in his eye showing that he had caught them in their snare and knew it.

"Ah but we have saved him, you see Captain Hook is my father and Fatima has accepted him as her adoptive one until he becomes her father in law. Now you wouldn't split up a family would you?" Nom simpered fully aware that they wouldn't, couldn't according to tribal law. Looking angrier than a hornet caught in a plastic easter egg the chief elder replied stiffly,

"No." then promptly left the room, the rest of the council following him in a decided huff. Nom turned his gaze gently towards Fatima. In the act of saving her from her fate of banishment Nom had stepped forward into a protective position in front of her. Now he looked back tenderly saying,

"Well we did it. You're off the hook." Fatima's smile grew increasingly wider and Nom took several steps towards her finally doing as he had longed to for so long. Their lips met with a kindness and gentleness that caressed their souls. The kiss was tender and joyful in light of the recent events. Nom was still in a state of shock that he got to be with her, he relished the fact that he could stay by her side and love her until the end of their days. He was sent into a state of supreme bliss just at the thought of their upcoming wedding which, although rushed still felt right and like it was meant to be. They came apart and at this time there could not have been two happier people on the face of this planet. Hook smiled from the door. He had come to congratulate them on their success, but seeing them having such a private moment he hadn't wanted to intrude. _They remind me of myself and Briar. Only in this instance Nom is healing her as well, not just her healing him. May their happiness last much longer than mine did. _With that he bowed out leaving them to one another feeling the happiness wash over him. _I'm feeling almost…optimistic._ He almost burst into laughter, _me, optimistic, Captain Jas. Hook one of the most feared pirates in the world a closet optimist. It's ironic really. _But who wouldn't be optimistic, I mean everything was falling into place now, every problem had been resolved, hadn't it?

* * *

_A/N I am so sorry for making you wait so long for this chapter. First I found out that the chronic, constant pain in my left hip may never go away and then it took me a really long time to decide which direction I wanted to take this story in and I'm still not entirely sure I made the right choice so I want you guys to let me know, do you think the whole Nom/Fatima thing was too rushed or do you think that the situation justified it enough? Let me know please!_

_Reviewers I'd like to thank_

_LadyLioness: Thank you for your suggestions and it's nice to hear I'm doing a good job. It's always really nice to hear from you,_

_Animetor777_


	12. Chapter 12

Fatima's silken black hair was shining beneath her veil of pure white. For this day she had managed to tame it into soft lying waves curling down her back covered in glowing silk. A sudden wave of embarrassment came over her and she shifted her eyes downward, her blush covered by the gossamer head scarf. She felt a reassuring pat on her arm in response and looked gratefully toward the pale sailor leading her down to Nom who stood waiting. _It's just like my dream. _Thought Hook laughingly, only instead of the terror he felt in his dream he could feel only joy at the thought of joining Fatima with his son. _May they have as much joy as Briar and I had_. He thought adding sorrowfully _and may it last much longer._ Finally they had reached Nom who gladly took her hands in his own. The elders stood over them as the two explained their reasons for this marriage, neither mentioning that is was a loophole they were taking advantage of to protect Hook and Fatima from tribal law. As tradition decreed after a reasonable amount of time the council approved the marriage and the two were free to go. Never had Fatima experienced such joy and on this day it felt as if all the heavens were smiling down upon her.

"It seems impossible but you're even more beautiful than before." Nom interrupted her thoughts seeing the small melancholy smile at the thought that it should have been her father to give her away not Hook. She smiled at Nom laughing at the easy way he complimented her. In their wave of joy they meandered back to Nom's, their, house. Nom paused on the threshold lifting up Fatima's veil to claim her lips, softly gently he kissed her until they both needed to come back for air. It seemed nothing could break their bliss and that it would go on for all time, eternity spent in a single moment of joy and deserved happiness. So it seemed. A harsh cry broke through their bubble of glee. The sound of gunshot filled the air. Nom's training as a warrior kicked in. Quickly he grabbed his twin swords and poison darts heading for the door. "Fatima stay here. You don't know how to fight and I can't lose you." She started to argue but he was already gone.

* * *

A cacophony of confusion surrounded Nom the moment he left his door. Everywhere people were streaming past him, fleeing from the terror of the muskets. Nom rushed through the crowd desperate to get to the source of this fear. He ran through the familiar village made unrecognizable in the turbulent shock. Finally he found what he was looking for. The source of the confusion, the heart of the problem. Nom's blood ran cold. It was a fearsome enemy they had thought would leave them be. An old foe who they had thought they had finally driven back. It was the Englishmen.

"They have better weapons, better armor and better supplies than we do. They have cut us off from all allies who might have helped us along with their supplies. We can only survive for so long. If we wait much longer we will die. We need to give them what they came for. We need to give them Hook." It had been three days since the English had come, this was the last day the English had given them to decide what to do. They wanted Hook and wouldn't take no for an answer. The council were sitting nodding their heads in agreement, until Nom spoke up.

"There has to be another way. I know that you do not like my father, really I haven't warmed up to him all that much either. But just giving him up is the equivalent of sacrificing our freedom to an imposed rule. Even if you don't care for the man, it weakens the morale of the warriors. They start to wonder what will their council do when it is them that the English are hunting? Will they be sacrificed like a lamb set to slaughter or will we fight for them. Council you must make your choice will you give in to this foreign rule or will we drive out the English once and for all?"

* * *

_A/N Ok so I know I've been gone for far too long, but real life got in the way…again. So now I have two directions I could take this story in, and since this story is ultimately for you, the readers I think I ought to let you guys decide. So here are your choices you can (a.) have the council give up Hook and then have Fatima and Nom go in to rescue him._

_(b.) have Hook give himself up but have Fatima refuse to deal with this and sacrifice herself instead. (the English soldiers need a healer) so please vote, the sooner you do the sooner I update. Also if you have any other ideas that you would like me to include please tell me those as well. leave your votes and ideas in a review and I will hopefully update soon._

_Animetor777_

_Reviewers for this chapter_

_LadyLioness: No that was not my final chapter as you can see and I hope you didn't think so and go away. I have several more chapters in this one before it is finished. And thank you for your support throughout this story! I really appreciate it._

_Barbiegirl 22: Thank you, I did really try with this one. I don't think we'll be flying back to London but Peter or Moira may make an appearance, maybe not, but we'll just have to see where this story leads. It is hook-centric after all. Thank you for your support of both of my stories. It's nice to hear that people like them!_


	13. Chapter 13

"_Council you must make your choice will you give in to this foreign rule or will we drive out the English once and for all?"_

**-Ch. 13-**

Cries of "Yes!" and "Drive them out!" filled the tent. The council sat for a moment furious that Nom had managed to so successfully manipulate them into seeing this battle as a fight for honor and freedom and not as what it really was, a pathetic excuse to protect an ignoble pirate captain. His perspicuous arguments had won over his fellow tribesmen and they were thirsting for a battle. The council had no choice but to give it to them. The tribal elder stood up and clapped his dark, rough, hands together once calling the council to attention. The room fell to silence. "Very well then we will attack the English at dawn. Any objections?" none came for a moment until the door of the tent burst open. A tall pale man with dark ringlets strode in.

"I have one. Don't waste your lives for me. You young warriors have full lives ahead of you. Don't throw them away for such a sorry excuse for a man as me. Tomorrow when the English come for me, I will go. And then hopefully they will leave this shore never to return." The Elder stood up and smirked at Nom, knowing he had won, had gotten what he wanted. Nom scowled the expression darkening his features. Hook turned to him. "My son I cannot undo my actions. But I can in some small way make up for abandoning hope that you had survived and giving up my search for you. I could not be more proud of you my boy and Fatima is an amazing person, take care of her, will you?"

"Of course, father. But stop talking like you are heading to your grave, this isn't over. Tomorrow you will have at least one of the Kahdoak warriors standing to protect you." A tense dread filled the room and knowing there was nothing more to do the council disintegrated.

Dawn came with the gentle golden glow of the sun faithfully beginning its ascent. Its rays glinted off the cold dark metal of the soldiers guns lined in rows of twelve. They faced strictly forward and their faces cast in the shadow of their wide, three-corner hats showed no expression. On the other side of the mutual line drawn in silence stood the Kahdoak warriors. Compared to the British they seemed horribly few to face up to such a threat, but to make up for their size a fierce bravery was lit in their seemingly pupiless dark eyes. The English Captain stepped forward snapping the mounting tension like twine stretched passed it's limit. "Where is Captain Jas. Hook? Was he too afraid to show himself? To face up to his dark deeds?" the disdainful, self-satisfied tone of the Captain's voice lit a fire of dislike in the hearts of many of the fierce warriors. They almost stepped forward when,

"Here I am. You needn't fear for my bravery, only for my scorn for how the British Navy has fallen and my seeming inability to follow rules laid out for me." Captain Hook came out from behind the ranks of warriors, seeming almost translucently pale beside their dark, sepia toned skin. "I have come to face up to my sins and let God be the judge of me." he started to step forward when someone burst out from his peripheral.

"NO! Don't take him!" Fatima screamed rushing out from the crowd. "When he did those things he was a man torn apart by mourning and self hatred. You cannot possible compare that to the man he is today, it would be like taking a one man and trying him for another's crimes. You cannot take him." The English Captain turned to face her.

"I am afraid we must my dear. We were ordered to capture him by the Queen herself and we need to get back to England, my men are tired and injured from their journey and need to get home to see physicians." He sent her an alligator-like smile.

"If it's your men's injuries that you fear for, take me instead. I am a healer, I can help them." The captain seemed to deliberate for a moment before deciding.

"Fine. Men take her to the ship." In his head he thought, _After all I can always capture the pirate scum later._ Two large blonde men in uniform came to her and she went with them without a fight. The warriors rushed towards the group only to have Fatima shake her head and glare at them. They stepped back, and she was gone, swallowed up by the ship's hatch.

* * *

Nom stalked down one length of the council tent, turned on his heel and paced back for the fiftieth time. No one had dared come near him since they had taken Fatima. He felt a warm hand laid upon his shoulder. He frowned at the offending appendage and then turned to glare at its owner.

"Son I know what you're going through. Believe me I know what it's like to lose someone you love. But all the anger in the world won't bring her back. She wouldn't want to see you like this." Nom felt his anger boil in the pit of his stomach then rise up and burst out in fearsome wave.

"Would you quit talking about her like she's dead?! Everyone keeps offering me their condolences and no one wants to do anything about the problem. Those despicable English captured her and it's up to us to get her back!" Nom stomped out but was stopped in his tracks by what his father said next.

"As I recall she walked on to that ship under her own power."

_How can he be so calm? It's sickening she gave her life to save him and he doesn't even want to do anything to get her back while we still have a chance. _"Yeah to save your sorry ass." Nom closed the flap of the tent violently images of Fatima scared and in pain dancing across his vision and filling his soul with rage.

* * *

When Fatima first walked down through the hatch she fully expected to be tossed into a cell, instead she was lead down a dingy hallway to what seemed to be a sort of dilapidated infirmary. She examined the jars on the shelves in front of her only to discover she didn't recognize anyone. _Thank God I brought my bag of herbs with me. _She looked around seeing a dozen dying men around her. Not one of them looked more than half alive and suddenly she understood why the captain had been willing to put off capturing her father in law. If these men didn't get medical attention and soon, they would die. And if these were the ones who made it into the overcrowded infirmary she could only guess what the condition of the others was. She nodded her head in determination. "Bring me some boiling water and fresh bandages."

* * *

_A/N So sorry for the lateness of this chapter, my computer has been a total spazzoid over the last month and it refused to let me save this chapter to upload it. Gah! Sometimes I hate technology, other times I love it, but right now it's just bothering me. Anyway here you go. Only one of you reviewed to tell me which ending you wanted to see so I just went with the one that felt the most natural to me. So remember RER Read Enjoy and Review!!! _

_Animetor777_

_Reviewer for this Chapter_

_LadyLioness thank you for your support and yes the perfect happily ever after with little or no struggle just doesn't sit well with me, and you know what that means PLOT TWIST! Thank you again for never failing to review, it really means a lot to me._

_Animetor777_


	14. Chapter 14

"_Bring me some boiling water and fresh bandages."_

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_**-**_**Chapter 14-**_  
_

Fatima worked the remainder of the day and well into the night and wouldn't have stopped then, but the ship's cook came and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Brought some soup for ye' Miss. Captain says I'm to watch out for ye' and make sure you don't go make yourself sick, 'cause then where'd we be?" Fatima smiled at the man seeing honest kindness in his twinkling blue eyes. She accepted the soup and sat down to eat, her legs nearly giving way underneath her.

"Steady there Miss. Can't 'ave you collapsin' on us now can we? We need you te' fix our mates. And besides I'm not one to leave a lady to become ill, ts'not in my nature, why don't you 'ave a lie down and you can just tell me what these lads need and I'll take care of it." Fatima nodded and moved over to a small miraculously unoccupied bunk. Before allowing herself to sleep she gave the ship's Captain her instructions.

"You'll need to boil some more water and swath any wounds that look like they could use a cleaning. Then you'll need to check the bandages to see if they're dirty or leaking, if they are you'll need to replace them. When you do make sure they're tied tightly, but not too tightly otherwise you'll cut off their lifeblood. Thank you, Mr…."

"Curly Ma'm and pleased to be of service."

"Yes thank you Mr. Curly, truly I do appreciate it." _Curly, what an odd name._ Fatima thought to herself before allowing herself to sleep, _Now where have I heard that name before? It doesn't matter, all that matters now is sleep._ With that she curled underneath the thin, tattered blanket closed her eyes and was asleep within seconds of her head reaching the pillow.

* * *

Nom crept through the village garbed in shadow. He snuck along the surfaces of the simple houses becoming one with the darkness cast by their walls. Strapped to his back were his trusted twin swords and a staff with the nicks and chafes of many battles. To avoid detection he rolled his feet into the soft sand around him with each step he took being more silent than the breeze. _Perfect, no one has woken up, no to slip onto the ship free Fatima from whatever vile prison they're keeping her in and bring her back to safety._

"You're going to start a war doing that." A voice came from the shadow it's body following it. The figure of his father separated from the darkness, Nom glared at him.

"What do you care? It's your fault she's trapped there. If you hadn't come here they wouldn't have either and then she would still be here and safe instead of in the hands of the enemy." Nom supplemented his speech with a spirited spit at Hook's feet.

"As I recall I didn't really have much of a choice in the matter of coming here. I seem to remember floating here passed out on a hunk of my ship." Hook's blue eyes pierced Nom's hazel ones trying to force him to come to terms with how ridiculous his accusations were. Nom reached for a sword and Hook laid a hand on his shoulder trying to calm him.

"Well then you should have left as soon as you were healed, by her I might add. And how do you repay her for saving your worthless life? By getting her captured and forced to pay for your crimes." Nom roughly pushed his way out of Hook's hold and continued on his way blending with the night once more. Hooks voice carried after him.

"All you'll cause by this is more bloodshed, something that she would abhor." When Nom didn't turn around Hook sent a silent prayer to heaven for his son's safety.

* * *

_Nom what are you doing? Fatima can handle herself; you'll only make her angry by assuming she needs rescuing. _But she **does** need rescuing._ Okay whatever you say but if this starts a war it's all __**your **__fault. _But you're in my head, how exactly does that work? _Shut up._ Oh great, Nom thought to himself, now I'm arguing with myself. _Well at least you'll always win._ Nom glared at the innocent sand beneath him, it'd only been a day but already worry over Fatima's safety in the hands of the British was making him mad with worry. _Well it'll all be over soon._ He thought as he looped his arm through some rope hanging off the side of the ship. As he made his way silently across the deck he saw sailors all around him passed out from booze, _Typical_, he thought judging them against the stories he'd heard of the British Navy. He went down a hatch and made his way to the makeshift infirmary using the familiar scent of creosote, mesquite and agave to guide him. As he came in the overwhelming stench of illness met him but he refused to be thwarted by it. Finding Fatima curled in sleep on a bunk he went to her and shook her to wakefulness. He smiled gently down on her expecting to be greeted as a praised rescuer with perhaps a snarky 'what took you so long' to ensure that she didn't get too mushy. What he didn't expect was this.

"What are you doing here?" Fatima hissed in a whisper to Nom.

He looked back at her shock filling his eyes. "Rescuing you from the vile British of course, now come on, we have to go before one of them wakes up." He glanced suspiciously around the room at the men lying in the bunks there.

"No." she said it simply, calmly almost as if she had planned for this.

"Excuse me?" he asked puzzled by her reaction.

"No I'm not coming back with you Nom, now go before you get caught." Nom shook his head taking her hand in his.

"I won't leave without you." Fatima smiled sadly at him but pulled her hand back.

"Yes you will now go." She motioned to the door.

"Fatima, this is ridiculous, come back with me to safety!" Fatima saw the fear in his eyes but shook her head.

"No Nom I will never turn my back on people who need me."

* * *

_A/N Well there you have it an update finally. And a somewhat longer one than lately at that. Two things in here 1) I hid an original Peter Pan reference in this chappie, first person to tell me who it's referencing and when gets a oneshot of their choice done by my, the only parameters are that it has to be with characters in a series I know and it can't be rated above a T. The second one is a bit more tricky, I hid a reference to a popular cartoon in this chapter as well first person to tell me what cartoon and what I referenced in this chapter also gets a oneshot. Virtual cookie if you can tell me what character and when. Well RER! And I hope to see you guys soon,_

_Animetor777_

_Reviewers for this chapter_

_As always LadyLioness, thank you again for your reviews, in answer to your question the men are sick with a number of illnesses including influenza and scurvy, but they also have infections from their wounds that they received in battles at sea with pirates. The ship has no actual infirmary because it is a battle ship and the Admirals decided it didn't need one, stupid Admirals, you always need an infirmary and skilled healer when heading out to sea for any period of time with a large number of people, but they were too war-crazy so they decided against it. Again thank you for your reviews and I hope to hear from you soon,_

_Animetor777_


	15. Chapter 15

_"No Nom I will never turn my back on people who need me."_

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Nom closed his eyes in frustration but he knew that look on Fatima's face, she wasn't going to let him or anyone else convince her to leave before these men were stable. He nodded once in acceptance and was about to leave, but instead he turned back and wrapped his arms around in a fierce hug. Fatima leaned into his embrace and stayed there for a few short moments before saying,

"Go Nom, before someone catches you." He was about to answer but Fatima cut him off, "I won't allow you to be captured, not if I can help it." Nom wanted to scoff at that comment, he wanted to tell her that he felt the same. _Doesn't she understand that it's the same for me? Why can't she grasp that I would go through anything if it meant securing her freedom and safety? _He gave her one last apologetic glance and then snuck out the way he had come. _I might not like it but she'd never forgive me if I were to force her to leave with me._ Nom glared up at the ship, _But I swear if you do anything to hurt her, and I mean anything, you.. will.. pay._ With that he disappeared into the night with no one on the ship, save Fatima, left with any knowledge of his ever having been there.

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Fatima let out a sigh as she watched Nom leave. How she wanted to go back to the village with him, how she longed to return home. But she couldn't. These men were all deathly ill and though they seemed to be showing some signs of improvement these signs were few and far between. The fact remained that without her they would die. And no one deserved that, to die when someone could have prevented it. _But these are the British they are the ones who killed your family, and tried to wipe out your people, you should hate them for what they have done! _An irritating voice that sounded suspiciously like her mentors snuck into her head. _Perhaps I should but I won't. Hate... it doesn't __**do anything,**__ nothing positive at least. If there were a little less hate in the world I would be helping these men solely because I care and not because it is part of the terms of my continued well-being. If there were a little less hate in the world Nom would not have been subject to a childhood of shame and ridicule, If there were a little less hate in the world my family would still be alive and I would have never had to grow up without them._ At this thought tears began to roll down Fatima's cheeks. It had been many years since her family was stolen from her but the pain she felt stung as much as it had the day she had found her father's charred corpse among the remains of her home. No she would not hate, she had seen what that would accomplish first hand and she didn't want to go down that path. She blinked and wiped away the tears with her sleeve, knowing that they would not help her accomplish her task. She started walking around the deck tending to those whose injuries were less serious and were thus not placed in the infirmary. Seeing nothing else that needed doing she returned to her makeshift bed and slept for the lingering hours of darkness.

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Morning came far too swift for Fatima's liking. She was returned to the waking world by the harsh voice of the captain.

"Wake up wench! What are you doing sleeping when my men are dying of illness! You're supposed to be a healer, why are none of them better yet!" he emphasized his point by waving his arms up and down as if trying to gain her attention. While he was doing this Fatima sat up and shook the sleep from her head.

"To answer your first question, I was sleeping because there was nothing else I could do for your men at the moment and it wouldn't exactly help them for me to be passing out from exhaustion, now would it? And I know that you're worried about your men, but with all due respect it's only been a day and a half, even a scratch wouldn't heal that quickly and they have considerably worse damage." She then rose and set another pot of creosote solution boiling and started checking to see who needed their bandages changed. The captain stood there in stunned silence. _How dare she speak to me that way! I'm the captain of a British royal command ship and she's just a.. a savage!_ But the captain at the very least knew when he was wrong and though she was insolent, he recognized that he had been unjust in his assumptions and judgments. He nodded and turned to leave.

"Before you go tell your healthy men to bring me some more fresh water and bandages if you have any more, if not bring me another pot so that I can clean the ones that I have." The captain nodded to her once again and then turned on his heel and left.

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The next few weeks Fatima spent in a haze of healing. And while the infection was by no means completely eradicated, the men were certainly better and no longer needed her to ensure their survival. One evening Fatima brought the good news to the captain. In the past few weeks, they had come to, not exactly friendly terms but rather a mutual understanding that they each needed each other for the time being. "Your men are nearly completely healed. It will still be a few weeks before they are ready to resume their normal duties, I do not need to be here for them to survive."

The captain nodded. "You understand that I cannot just let you go don't you? You are merely the place holder for former Captain Hook." Fatima nodded she had known going into this that it was only a temporary solution. That at some point James would have to pay for his deeds. She had just hoped… hoped what? That the British would see that he had changed and **not** arrest him? That the fact he had changed somehow erased his crimes? No even to herself these arguments sounded false. _I guess I just hoped that he would have more time to spend reunited and reconciled with his son. That he could have a bit of happiness in his life. _She was pulled from her reverie by the captain.

"What's this no pleading for him? No more cries about how he has changed and how that somehow makes his former crimes null? No arguments for why he should be left free?"

Fatima nodded, "You speak derisively about his change, but the fact is that it is true, Captain Hook is not the man that he once was. Despite this I know that something must be done to ease the suffering that he has caused. I do not think that his death or imprisonment will soothe this pain, but I know that under your laws that is how you deal with criminals and I know that he is bound by your laws. I will not ask you to break them and tomorrow I will go and I guess that he will come. But I ask you for two things, firstly a day so that I may say goodbye." She paused here waiting for his response,

"Granted as payment for saving my men." Fatima nodded her thanks.

"And for you to think about what you are doing. Will it really help the world if he rots in prison for what he has done? If his metamorphosis does not change what he did will this? I do not pretend to know the answers to these questions, but before you take away his life, please just think about it. Until tomorrow then." Fatima rose and left a bewildered captain in her wake.

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Later that evening a messenger arrived in the village to say that Captain Hook had better be ready to leave with the British the next day at sun down. Nom sat on the beach staring at the ship in the distance, brooding. His father walked up to him and sat down beside him.

"Don't look so dour your wife is returning to you tomorrow." Hook smiled at him and Nom nodded.

"Yes but you're going to be leaving, this time for good." Over the past few weeks they had grown closer and Hook had told him about his mother, him and their life together.

"Captain Hook, father, before you leave I want you to know that I forgive you and I love you, even it's worth nothing because your never coming I want you to know that your son loves you."

"Nathanial, no the owner of that name died long ago, Nom, that is worth everything to me. Thank you. And I want you to know that it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. Believe it has taken far too long to come to that conclusion but I finally have reached it." Nom nodded sadly. "Get some sleep, Fatima is coming home tomorrow." At that Nom smiled. It had been too long since he had seen her and he longed to have her once again back where she belonged.

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_A/N I truly am sorry for the length that it has been since I updated and for the utter fail that is the chapter above. It is sufficient to say that AP classes and touring choir ate my life. Anyways I hope that you have not all abandoned me as you would have a complete right to. Oh and before I go the references in the last chapter are as follows Mr. Curly is THE Curly from the original Peter Pan and the second one is a quote from Avatar The Last Airbender episode 3 of season 3 "The Painted Lady" the character I'm quoting is of course Katara. The first reference was found by LadyLioness. The second sadly no one found._

_Reviewers for chapter 14  
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_As always LadyLioness: Yes it is the Curly from the original Peter Pan and no it doesn't really come into play it was just to catch the reader's attention. I hope that you haven't given up on me and this story but if you have I would completely understand. So anyways oneshot for you! Either message me or tell me in a review what you would like._


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